The guy who spent years on the House Intelligence Committee while literally sleeping with a Chinese spy named “Fang Fang” is now crying on social media because the FBI wants to release the files on his little espionage romance. “Donald Trump is targeting me,” whimpered Rep. Eric Swalwell (D-CA). “He’s scared.”
Scared? Of Eric Swalwell? Buddy, the only people scared of you are the counterintelligence analysts who had to write up the details of your pillow talk with a Beijing honeypot.
So here’s what triggered Congressman Honeypot’s latest meltdown. FBI Director Kash Patel — God bless that man — sent agents in the bureau’s San Francisco office to redact and prepare a trove of files on Swalwell’s cozy relationship with Christine Fang. She was a Chinese Ministry of State Security operative who spent years burrowing into California politics like a termite in a wooden leg. The files could drop as early as next week.
Swalwell’s response was pure comedy gold. He hopped on X and declared, “There is only one reason why: he’s scared,” apparently referring to Trump. Then he called himself “the favorite” in California’s governor’s race and announced that Trump wants a “Western White House” with “an enabler on the opposite coast.”
An enabler! That’s rich coming from the guy who literally enabled a foreign spy to fundraise for his campaign and plant an intern in his congressional office. According to multiple reports, Fang’s “access” to Swalwell went well beyond professional networking, if you catch our drift.
Christine Fang’s tradecraft was about as subtle as a brick through a window. She drove a white Mercedes, claimed to be a college student despite looking a decade older than her classmates, and was photographed cozying up to a known Chinese consular intelligence officer. She also reportedly had sexual relationships with at least two Midwestern mayors that the FBI caught on surveillance.
Real Jason Bourne stuff. If Jason Bourne drove a leased Mercedes and hung out at city council mixers.
Fang’s operation ran from 2011 to 2015, right up until federal investigators got spooked enough to give Swalwell a “defensive briefing.” That’s the polite intelligence community term for “hey, your girlfriend works for Beijing.” Swalwell cut ties and Fang conveniently hopped on a plane back to China before anyone could slap handcuffs on her.
But surely they pulled his security clearance after that, right?
Ha. Of course not. After all of this came out, Democrats kept Swalwell on the House Permanent Select Committee on Intelligence. He kept his access to some of the most classified information in the United States government. And what did he do with that platform? He spent years on cable news accusing Donald Trump of being a Russian agent.
We need to pause here because the hypocrisy is genuinely staggering, even by Washington standards.
Chris Matthews once asked Swalwell on MSNBC whether Trump was a Russian asset “like in the 1940s where you had people who were ‘reds.’” Swalwell answered, “He’s working on behalf of the Russians, yes.”
The guy who got honeypotted by Chinese intelligence went on national television and accused the President of the United States of being compromised by a foreign power. These people have no shame. Zero. They don’t even know where shame lives on a map.
Once Republicans got back in power in the House, then Speaker of the House leader Kevin McCarthy booted Congressman Honeypot off the Intelligence Committee, noting that the man who “can’t get a security clearance in the private sector” doesn’t deserve access to some of the highest level of classified information available. If Swalwell applied for a job at Lockheed Martin tomorrow, his background check would spontaneously combust.
Now here’s where it gets spicy. The FBI is reportedly considering offering Fang Fang a U.S. visa to come back and spill everything she knows about her relationship with Swalwell. They’ve even discussed sending agents to China to interview her. When the FBI is willing to roll out the red carpet for a foreign spy just to get the full story on a sitting congressman, you know you’re cooked. No amount of posting “he’s scared of me!” on X is going to dig you out of that hole.
Meanwhile, Congressman Honeypot is running for governor of California. He’s currently polling as the top Democrat in the race, which tells you everything you need to know about the California Democratic Party. His Democratic rival, billionaire Tom Steyer, is already going after him — and it turns out Swalwell might be faking his California residency. His “home” in the state? A rented room in a relative’s 1,300-square-foot house in Livermore.
Very gubernatorial.
There’s also the small matter of a criminal referral for mortgage fraud on his D.C. home. Because of course there is. The man reportedly carries $100,000 in student loan debt and roughly $50,000 on each of two credit cards — after thirteen years earning $174,000 annually in Congress. Where’s all the money going, Eric? Fang Fang’s been gone for a decade.
Adam Schiff rushed to Swalwell’s defense on X, calling the FBI file release “as dangerous as it is unlawful.” Naturally. Schiff and Swalwell were Trump’s impeachment tag team — one of them got caught in bed with a spy and the other one just made stuff up on his own. (What a duo.)
Release every last page, Kash. We’ve been paying for this man’s salary and security clearance for over a decade. The least we deserve is the receipts.
